Let’s Work on Keeping Our Thoughts Inside Our Heads
What family TV night taught me about writing
Over the weekend, my daughter was watching the television series From with my mom.
For context, watching TV with my mom is quite the experience.
She reacts out loud to everything.
Sudden gasps. Random questions. Guesses about twists that haven’t even been set up yet. She’ll ask, “Is he the killer?” during episode one when none of us have any idea what’s going on.
She doesn’t mean to interrupt. She just narrates what she’s feeling while the rest of us are trying to follow along.
The Quote I’m Keeping
I’m in the laundry room folding clothes when I overhear my daughter say:
“Ema… let’s work on keeping our thoughts inside of our heads.” (Ema is what my kids call their grandma. Don’t ask me where that nickname came from — no one knows.)
I laughed so hard I had to stop folding.
In one sentence, she told my mother something that I’ve wanted to say for over 30 years.
What It Means for Writing
I’ve started saying it to myself now.
“Let’s work on keeping our thoughts inside of our heads.”
It’s funny, but it’s also useful. Because not every thought belongs in the draft.
And definitely not in the final one.
When I beta read, I can usually tell when a writer hasn’t learned how to hold back yet.
You see it in dialogue that explains too much. In paragraphs that drag on because the author is trying to explain every detail instead of trusting the reader to connect the dots.
Where Writers Get Stuck
It doesn’t mean the writer isn’t talented.
Usually it just means they are still figuring out the difference between what belongs on the page and what doesn’t.
And that is normal.
Sometimes it takes several drafts to figure out what matters. But part of getting better is learning when a thought belongs in your story and when it needs to remain unsaid.
Here are a few ways I check myself when revising:
If a line explains something the reader already knows, I cut it.
If the dialogue sounds like it’s for me and not the character, I cut it.
If a backstory detail only matters to me, I cut it.
If I’m not sure, I leave myself a note and come back to it later. Usually, it’s to cut it.
The Takeaway
The goal isn’t silence.
It’s choosing what matters for the story, and gently letting the rest go.
Sometimes what you don’t say is just as powerful as what you do.
Until next time!
-Mia
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